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How to Handle Job Rejections and Move Forward

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We’ve all been there. That moment during your job search when you open your email, heart pounding with anticipation, only to read those dreaded words: “We regret to inform you…” It’s a blow, no doubt about it. But I’m here to tell you that job rejections are not only common, they’re also an integral part of the journey to your ideal career.

Rejection hurts; that’s a fact. But the truth is that you may have to weed through a lot of “no”s to get to that one, life-changing “yes.” How do you manage the emotional roller coaster that may come with this process?

Framing Rejection Constructively

Firstly, let’s get one thing clear: a job rejection is not a reflection of your worth. It’s simply a part of the process. In the job market, there are numerous factors at play – timing, competition, specific skill sets, and sometimes sheer luck. Employers are looking for the right fit, the same as you are. There are likely quite a few applicants for one position, and all but one of those applicants is going to get a yes.

So do the math: being on the applicant end, this means you are likely to get more rejections than job offers. This is as true for CEOs as it is for entry-level positions. It’s not personal; it’s a numbers game. Remember, it doesn’t matter how many rejections you get: you only need the right one to say yes.

Maintaining a Positive Mindset

Now, this is easier said than done, but maintaining a positive mindset is crucial. When faced with rejection, it’s easy to slip into negative self-talk. Challenge these thoughts. Instead of dwelling on the rejection, focus on your strengths, your accomplishments, and most importantly, your potential. You have unique skills and experiences that make you valuable. Celebrate them.

Learning from Each Experience

Every rejection is an opportunity for growth. Ask for feedback if it’s appropriate, and use that feedback constructively. If you find any common thread among potential employers as to why you weren’t selected, it may point to an areas for improvement that you can work on. Also, consider the jobs you’re applying for. Are they truly aligned with your skills and passions? Sometimes, rejection happens simply because you’re not a good fit for the job you’re applying for, and the employer can see that better than you can. If this happens, it may be time to dig a little deeper–search your own passions and motivations and make sure you’re applying for the right types of positions.

Practice Self-Care

Job hunting can be stressful. It’s essential to take care of your mental and physical wellbeing during this time. Exercise regularly, eat healthily, maintain a regular sleep schedule, and take time to relax and do things you enjoy. Surround yourself with supportive people who inspire and motivate you.

Keep Moving Forward

Don’t let rejection paralyze you. Keep applying, keep interviewing, and keep improving. Remember, it’s often through facing challenges that we grow the most.

Rejection can be tough, but it’s also a part of the journey to success. And remember, every “no” brings you one step closer to that “yes” you’re looking for. You’re not alone in this journey, and with perseverance, resilience, and a positive mindset, you’ll find the right opportunity.

You have the strength to handle job rejections and move forward. Let’s take on this challenge together. If you could use some extra help identifying and locating the right job opportunities, let’s have a conversation. To schedule a free initial consultation with me, click here to access my calendar.

fulfilled, happy

Why Finding the Right Job Matters

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fulfilled, happy

Have you ever had a job you hated?

Maybe you have a job right now that you greatly dislike. Do you live for the weekends and dread every weekday?

If you do, you’re not alone. In fact, a recent Gallup Poll of workers in 200 countries around the world found that 85 percent of workers hate their jobs. Can you imagine how much job-hating that is? That means only 15 percent of the world’s workforce are truly engaged at work.

Some countries are worse than others. In Japan, for example, the number of people who dislike their jobs is 94 percent. Here in the U.S., it’s slightly better, at 70 percent. But those numbers are still staggering, especially considering that for most us, the pursuit of happiness is our number one goal.

But…Why?

Why do so many people hate their jobs? We could probably fill books with thoughts, ideas and data trying to answer that question—we certainly can’t answer it in a blog post. So let’s narrow it down to a more personal question, one you can answer for yourself:

Why would you work in a job you hate?

Most of us could rattle off a litany of reasons why. Most are financially related:

  • We’re in debt.
  • We’ve got bills to pay.
  • We’ve got a family to feed.
  • We need the insurance right now.
  • They’ve got a good retirement plan.

All of these are legitimate concerns, to be certain—but they also have another similar thread running through them. Each of these reasons places happiness and fulfillment in the future. If you can only get out of debt; if you can only “get ahead”; if you can save up enough for retirement; then sometime later, maybe, you can live the life you really want.

Don’t get me wrong. I think delayed gratification is a noble thing—sacrifice a little pleasure now for higher yields later. But that’s not really what’s happening here because the fact is, you don’t know if things are going to get better. You don’t know if you’ll even live to retirement age (not to be morbid)—and if you do, you don’t know how many years you’ll actually get to enjoy retirement. If you’re going to delay gratification, it should be for something more tangible than maybe someday.

As a career coach, I deal with people all the time who have a very real need for a job. Some are willing to take any job, even one they might hate, as long as it helps them earn a living or even get ahead financially. I often have to challenge these clients to think differently. I try to help them see that being between jobs actually gives them an opportunity—a chance to work not just in any job, but in the right job. I want to help them find a position with purpose, not just a job with a salary. A position that will truly fulfill them and engage them, one they actually look forward to getting up for in the mornings.

Believe it or not, those jobs do exist.

After working for decades in HR, I’m convinced that the reason someone hates their job isn’t always because the job isn’t a good one. Sometimes, yes, you get a bad company or a bad boss. But in so many cases, people dislike their work simply because it’s not a good fit for them. Maybe the job pays the bills, but it doesn’t line up with their emotional makeup or their personal sense of purpose. They stay in that job because they feel they have to (even though they don’t). But when you’re between jobs, I think there’s no excuse for taking a job you’re bound to hate. That’s why much of my early process deals with helping my client discover their own strengths, talents, desires and passions. To me, those qualities help us set a direction to find the kind of career will truly make them happy. My clients are often surprised when they do a bit of soul searching. In the process, they discover what they are truly passionate about, and how many different possibilities open up for them when they do.

You will spend the majority of your life at work. Why waste that time doing a job you hate? Why not invest some time and patience in your long-term happiness so you can find the right job—the right career—for you? I specialize in helping people at doing just that. For a free 30-minute consultation, give me a call at 646-320-1126.

impostor syndrome

Overcoming “Impostor Syndrome” (part 1)

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impostor syndrome

“I have written 11 books, but each time I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.'”

“I have this constant fear that I’m a fraud and that I’m going to be found out.”

Do you ever doubt your own accomplishments? Do you ever feel like any praise you’ve gotten in life is mostly undeserved? Do you feel ill-equipped to handle any job, no matter how much education and training you’ve gotten for it? Whatever success you’ve had so far, do you believe it’s pure dumb luck—that you don’t really deserve it? That when people figure out you’re a fraud, it’s all going to be taken away?

There’s a name for this feeling; it’s actually a thing. It’s called impostor syndrome. And if you suffer from it, the first thing you need to know is you’re not alone.

Researchers say as many as 70 percent of us struggle with impostor syndrome at some point. Seventy percent. And that number includes some of the most successful people on the planet.

Look back at the quotes I led with at the top of this article. Care to venture a guess as to who said the first quote?

Maya Angelou.

That’s right. The late Maya Angelou—the icon—thought she was a fake.

And the second one? Michelle Pfeiffer. Two years ago, in an interview.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Some other people you might have heard of, both living and deceased, who’ve struggled with impostor syndrome:

  • Actress Jessica Chastain confesses to a constant fear that she will be fired from a role.
  • Actor/director Jodie Foster believed winning the Oscar was a fluke, and she thought someone was going to knock on her door and tell her it was all a mistake.
  • World Health Organization Chairwoman Margaret Chan: “There are an awful lot of people out there who think I’m an expert. How do these people believe all this about me?”
  • Musical icon David Bowie: “I had enormous self-image problems and very low self-esteem, which I hid behind obsessive writing and performing. … I really felt so utterly inadequate.”
  • Author John Steinbeck: “I am not a writer. I’ve been fooling myself and other people.”
  • Former First Lady Michelle Obama: “It doesn’t go away, that feeling that you shouldn’t take me that seriously. What do I know?”

Get the idea?

Don’t get me wrong: I think we all struggle with some form of self-doubt from time to time, even if it’s only fleeting. I think that’s just part of being human. But when that self-doubt begins to cripple us, threatens to crush us, causes us to turn inward, makes us want to stop trying…that’s when impostor syndrome comes in full force, causing us to become our own worst critic. No, that’s too tame a word. Our own worst enemy.

Impostor syndrome can be especially detrimental when you’re trying to forge a new path career-wise. It can zap your confidence just when you’re trying to brace up for the next job interview. It can cause you to procrastinate picking up the phone to follow up on that prospective client. It can cause you to lounge in bed watching reruns of The Office on Netflix when you should be checking LinkedIn for new job opportunities.

After all, you tell yourself, if you were fired or laid off, it was because they figured out you were a fraud, anyway. And if you quit your last job…you managed to get out before they found out what you really were.

Crippling self-doubt.

Obviously, this issue requires a bit of deeper diving, so in the next post we’ll explore some creative ways you can deal with and overcome impostor syndrome. For now, though, if you feel this way, take heart. Some of the most successful people in history have felt just as you do now.

And they made it.

And so can you.

(Click here to read Part 2)